


Skyrim Roleplay Short Stories

by Nelthalen, Paralexium



Category: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Gay Relationship, Comfort, Crying, Drinking, Drunkenness, Elves, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fire Magic, Gay Panic, Half-Elves, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Inspired by Roleplay/Roleplay Adaptation, Kinda fluff, M/M, Magic, Nuvian needs a hug, Original Character(s), Panic Attacks, Protectiveness, RP, Self-Harm, Skyrim References, Slow Burn, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:01:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22059745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nelthalen/pseuds/Nelthalen, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paralexium/pseuds/Paralexium
Summary: A collection of short stories and prompts written by us in a form of role play.Characters used in these stories are original characters made by us, inspired by the universe of Skyrim.Prompts and ideas are always welcome as this helps us delve deeper into our characters and develop them further.Every chapter will be named with a title together with the ship in focus.
Relationships: Hirskar/Cerex, Kelvion/Nuvian, Original Male Character(s)/Original Male Character(s)
Kudos: 1





	Skyrim Roleplay Short Stories

**Author's Note:**

> English is not our native language so sorry about any grammatical error and the likes. 
> 
> This is also the first time we have been role playing on a serious note, with the intention of getting better at writing while having fun with it. The way we went about it all was that, one of us would start out writing a paragraph, while the other waited for them to finish. When finished, the second person would go ahead and respond to the previous paragraph written. So on and so forth. 
> 
> Hope y'all will enjoy this first piece, with the hope of more to come soon.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group consisting of Cerex, Nuvian, Kelvion and Hirskar have decided to restock their inventory in the city of Riverwood. Nuvian was left to his own devices so of course the tavern was his first and only stop.  
> Kelvion ended up having to follow the other two but hurriedly made for a leave in hopes of catching the red-head in the tavern he'd gone to. 
> 
> A hope of a new acquaintance and possibly more quickly turned into more sour and dire events for the two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally for the first chapter we had a prompt going, but we got distracted, and ended up forgetting about it as we wrote the leading up to it.  
> The prompt being:  
> "I can't be in love with you"  
> "Lying isn't a good look for you"
> 
> These dialogues will not be found in this story, but bear in mind that this was the inspiration for our piece

Kelvion sighed lightly through his nose as his two traveling companions continued to bicker among themselves behind him, neither Cerex nor Hirksaar paying attention to the fact he was taking his leave.

The people of Riverwood were busy with their daily work and duties and it was an adequate stop for the group to restock their supplies. After arriving, they had discussed on what to aquire and Kelvion had planned on what to do with his own time, yet had found himself being dragged along with Cerex and Hirksar on their supply hunt.

Nuvian, left to his own devices, was under instructions from Cerex to remain within the town perimeter. Regardless, Kelvion had made the observation that this usually meant the red-haired half-elf could be located at the nearest tavern or other drinking hole.

Kelvion found his company pleasant and he wanted to further improve their camaraderie so to speak. Nuvian was, in his words, something else than what Kelvion was used to. Innocent and yet tainted at the same time. He has a shadow in his eyes, but not the kind of darkness you see in the eyes of those who have no soul or heart. Rather, it is a shadow of the trials that he has overcome, a mark which a cruel world leaves on you after its claws has rendered your flesh and you are left to stitch yourself back together. 

Coming out of his musings, Kelvion arrived at the tavern ́s door and entered. The smell of cooking food and the warmth of a hearth greeted him. He nodded to the barkeep as he approached and gazed around the open room. Then his gaze was quickly brought back around as he spied the back of the one he was searching for. Red waves lay unruly on his shoulders, Nuvian was seated at the counter, engaged in what appeared to be a somewhat stilted, one-sided conversation with a serving girl. 

After observing the interaction for a few moments, Kelvion decided to save the poor girl who seemed to be looking for an escape. Taking a seat besides Nuvian, Kelvion placed an order for a round of mead and the server hurried off to do as bid. Then he looked at the half-elf, “Not to sound nosy mind you, but would this be your first stop in every settlement?”.

Nuvian had settled down in the tavern quite well and quickly in fact. He had not anticipated the sound of the assassin coming up from behind him at the counter.

He was in the midst of chatting up a fine Nord woman, trying out everything Hirskar had taught him how to court a woman, however it was quite contradictory seeing as he was with Cerex… whatever really.

The new-comer of the group, Kelvion, had just scared off the fine lady, and was now asking him questions that really didn’t concern him. For a moment Nuvian thought about how he should retort the question back

“Well, if you didn’t want to sound nosy, why did you ask anyways? However, to answer your question, yes this is and will always be my first stop in all settlements.” 

Nuvian hadn’t meant for it to come out sounding rude or mean. Maybe it was the mead he’d had that made him this way, or maybe it had just been a long day. He was starting to get tired of the never ending breathing down his neck, following him like a lost dog. It was hard enough to have Cerex following and observing his every move, Hirskar too but he wasn’t so bad.

“Wait… Did Cerex and Hirskar send you here to check on me? Keeping me out of trouble perhaps… I’m not a damn child you know?” The last sentence was filled with venom, hissed out through his gritted teeth. His grip around the mug of mead tightened, making the wood squeak slightly, ever so slightly. 

He couldn’t really blame Kelvion though, doing the deeds of his would be foster parents, he wasn’t a bad guy but he’d caught Nuvian in one of his “moods”.

The anger rose in him, simmering at the bottom, he noticed the handle that had been squeaking in his tight hold had begun to feel warmer, and not the kind of warmth that comes from holding something for a long period of time. His scar on the underside of his left hand starting to itch now, Nuvian couldn’t hold back the temptation of scratching at it with his right hand, however he didn’t roll up the sleeve of his shirt. 

There was no need to show this to someone like Kelvion… The only one who had ever really seen his scar was Cerex, that was enough. Keeping the scratch going to occupy his brain and give relief to the itchiness let up the warmth of the mug handle, keeping it all under control. He had given Kelvion no eye contact ever since he’d sat down. 

Now however as he was about to send him away, he turned his head towards the sandy-haired Redguard, hardening his eyes while telling him, “You can leave. There is nothing for you here, i’m being a good boy. You can let the daddies know.” 

The last thing Nuvian did was to remove his right hand from the scratching, to give a sort of shooing wave, letting Kelvion know he had permission to go away now and let him be in peace. His right hand returning to its position on the under side of his left arm.

It seemed this little fox had a fine set of fangs to flash, Kelvion thought, slightly amused. Nuvian had given an obvious dismissal, in no mind for company. Yet it was half hearted as far as Kelvion could tell. 

He had long learned to read the signs which folks gave away in interactions with each other. Nuvian would not meet his eye, which meant that the half-elf was not sure enough to confront him directly. And more curiously, his apparent habit of scratching at his left arm. It seemed like an ich, perhaps not a conscious effort, a habit which he would result to when irritated or agitated. He found that it made him curious, why did Nuvian do that? 

It was like second nature to Kelvion, analyse, observe and calculate. He stored everything he saw and made a profile on the person in front of him. He enjoyed finding new pieces to the puzzle that was Nuvian.

A new thing he observed, the younger had a need for showing that he could be independent. A need that must stem from his interactions with Cerex most likely. The tavern girl came then with a jug of mead for him, and he took a sip, turning his eyes away from Nuvian.

“No need for worries, the grown ups didn't send me to find their lost boy. I managed to sneak away while they were perusing the stalls for supplies. Cerex was quite adamant that I help out, but they seemed to have it handled, so I left them behind. Besides, Hirskar looked like he wanted them to have time, just the two of them, but he was too polite to say anything. Or he was too cowed by the elf to say anything,” he chuckled.

In truth, Kelvion had just wanted a moment away from the nagging of Cerex and his suspicious glares. Nuvian being in the tavern made it better all the more. He side-eyed Nuvian ́s arm quickly. 

“I can understand a need to get a moment for yourself, so I ask for forgiveness that I'm here right now. But I thought that we might take a quiet moment and to make acquaintance now that there is no immediate danger. It has after all been a rough couple of days as of late. How are you holding up? You seem capable of holding your own in a fight, your nimble on your feet and have a fast blade.” He took another sip of mead.

Then Kelvion turned on his stool, facing Nuvian. Putting one foot up on his other knee and resting his elbow on the counter, he slouched slightly in his seat, regarding the other. The flames from the nearby hearth made the red locks seem to dance with light.

To say the least, Nuvian had not expected the other to stay even after paying him so little attention, and for being kind of rude towards him. Neither had he expected the praise and acknowledgement of his skills. It was something else to hear it from another than Cerex and Hirskar.

The simmering anger left him slowly, his right hand faltering from the scratching on the scar. “Uh.. Tha-thank you.” A pause, then he continued, “Look, I'm sorry I got angry at you, I had no reason to do that. It’s just, having those two breathing down your neck the entire time… it can get so annoying, you know?” Nuvian sighed. 

Imagine if he’d told Cerex that directly, he’d be disappointed in him, telling him it’s for his own good. He’d also be hurt. Seeing the other had turned in his seat, Nuvian did the same, letting him know he was welcome here and that he was open for conversation.

“I suppose I should also thank you for letting those two have a little time on their own, they don’t get to do that often with us around. As you say, now would be a perfect time for us to make acquaintance.” Before he continued, Nuvian took a sip of the new mug of mead the server had placed on his side of the counter. 

“You know my name, and I could imagine you know a bit about where I come from. Seeing as you and Hirskar have been spending quite the quality time together yeah? If not, then please, feel free to ask anything. I know very little of you too. If you please, I'd love to know more” Once more the mug was brought up to his lips, this time taking a long drink. 

Feeling pleased that his initiative had brought positive results, Kelvion gave a small smile in answer. 

“So they are indeed together? Should have been obvious, Hirskar has an open affection all around him when it comes to Cerex. Almost like a puppy, that one.” He thought for a moment as he regarded Nuvian, formulating questions he would like answered.

“Im curious on how you three winded up in such a group together. There is a story there I can tell. But mostly, I would like to know, where do you come from? You have skills for combat, but from the way you move, i'd say you were used to sneaking around. I have lived most of my life in Hammerfell before I made my way to Skyrim some years ago”. 

He hoped that by giving a bit of information, Nuvian would be lenient to answer his question. “I have no surname to give im afraid, just my first, Kelvion”.

That was a lot of questions, then again Nuvian had asked for them. He started out by answering the first question, or rather confirming it “Yes, they have been together for quite a while. But if you ask Cerex he would probably deny it. Not to be mean or rude towards Hirskar, but merely because he is a reserved elf who keeps his guard up.”

Nuvian shifted in his seat, crossing his legs while resting his left arm on the counter. His right hand holding his mug of fine mead, ready to answer the next question in line for him.

“How the group came to be you ask? Hm… well you could say I kind of fell right into Cerex’s arms… literally. He helped me through a tough time in Riften. Had it not been for Cerex, I’d been dead by now. Hirskar we somehow picked up while traveling, coming across a tiny village called Karthwasten. He has a sister there, Fjorta. Not by blood mind you, Hirskar never knew his parents.”

Having now neared the bottom of his mead, Nuvian ordered a new from the serving Nord woman before picking up on the last questions. 

“So that’s the short story of how we came to be. Now for your last question, as mentioned earlier I met Cerex in the Riften woods while running away from some guards. I might have… you know… tried to steal from someone I shouldn't have. That someone being Maven Black-briar. I was supposed to become an official member of the Thieves Guild, I was pretty much brought up in that guild but was never actually a member of it per say. Having lived in that guild for many years obviously had its perks, training for combat and sneaking about. Also, surnames matter little to me, as long as you have a name I couldn’t care less.” With that said, Nuvian gulped down more mead from his newly filled mug. 

This was his third, or maybe fifth? He had not a clue anymore.

One thing was for certain though, and that was the fact that the room was spinning. His eyelids felt heavy, and reality seemed to slip every now and then.

Since when had Kelvion had four eyes and not two like normal? He couldn’t possibly have been drinking that much. 

For a moment, Kelvion found himself astounded. Everybody knew of the Black-Briar clan and their ties to the Thieves Guild. Maven ́s temper and wrath were just as famous, if not even more.

The Dark Brotherhood had had dealings with them many times in the past, but Kelvion had never received a contract. Astrid had always shown disdain for the guild despite their need for the brotherhood ́s services. For Nuvian to have stolen from Maven, and to be caught in the act was as good as a death sentence in Riften. 

“I must be honest, I had not expected that to be your story”, he took a slow sip from his mug, eyeing the red-head calculatingly. 

“That would not have ended well for you I'm sure. It's a good thing you...ran into Cerex. It ended up alright it would seem, though I would advise from returning to Riften anytime soon.” 

Kelvion noticed that Nuvian was downing his mead much like water, bigger gulps and carelessly. 

He wondered, how many mugs the other had emptied already. It couldn't have been much, could it? Kelvion looked into Nuvian ́s eyes closer. His gaze seemed wavering, slightly unfocused. “So they trained you, the guild that is. I have heard many stories of them, though admittedly far from all good. But, training is training”. He watched as Nuvian took another sip.  
A blush having broken out on his cheekbones, made his eye colors stand out even more. Kelvion found that he liked that look on the half-elf. It was...endearing. He bit his lip and observed the other.

“I'm sure there is much more to the story, but let us discuss that another time. I should like to hear it from all parties. Thank you for disclosing this to me though, sounds like quite an adventure.” Nuvian had clearly gotten more liquor than he could handle. 

Kelvion had to fight back a grin. Nuvian was a light weight it seemed. 

“Nuvian”, he asked hesitantly, “how many mugs have you had?” Kelvion leaned in a little closer. The flush was spreading down his neck too it seemed, Kelvion wondered briefly how far down it went. 

Refocusing, Nuvian hadn’t actually heard much of what the other had said to him. He had regained some of his focus in time to hear Kelvion asking him how many mugs of mead he’d had. Hadn’t he already answered that? Or was that more of an answer to himself? “... wh-what do ya mean? I've - i’ve onl-lyyy had liiiike two? Do be quiet.” 

His anger was simmering up in him again. Really, who was this sandy-haired Redguard to tell him, or rather ask him how many drinks he’d had?

“None of your business.”

That was the answer Nuvian gave him, even though he had already answered the question just a second ago. Nuvian felt the simmering in his stomach, slowly making its way up through his system.

Wait… a feeling like anger shouldn’t be making its way up his throat like this. Realizing what it was, Nuvian quickly put his right hand over his mouth in an attempt to keep the bile down. This resulted in the mug dropping to the floor, spilling out the mead all over. If not for the sheer fact that he was about to throw up, he would have picked up the mug and drank what was left of it. Now was not the time for that.

Keeping his hand in front of his mouth, Nuvian jumped to his feet trying to gain some balance as well as he could. As he stood up, his gag reflex began to act up. He kept it in though, running towards the closest door to the outside where he could throw up all the toxins in his body.

He cared little for the fact that he’d left Kelvion inside the tavern, not knowing what in all of Tamriel had just happened. Not that he himself cared much right now, as streams of bile fossed out of his mouth, until there was not a drop left in his stomach. 

Even after nothing was left, he kept gagging. The only thing coming up being the acid from his stomach. The taste of it would fill his mouth the rest of the day. 

Kelvion watched in trepidation as Nuvian became a blur in his haste to leave the building. His frame quickly out the door. For a short moment it was quiet in the tavern, the bartender sending him a look of slight annoyance and worry. 

Kelvion gave an apologetic small bow of his head before he ran for the exit, hoping to catch up with Nuvian. 

Coming outside, he didn't immediately catch sight of the half-elf, but the sound of retching to the side told him where to go. He hurried around the side of the building, there he was met with one quite pitiful sight. Nuvian, bend forward over the ground, gurgling as his emptied the contents of his stomach. 

Seeing the red-head in such a state, Kelvion felt his own stomach clench with sympathy. Making a quick decision, Kelvion went to Nuvian ́s side, and placed an arm carefully on his back. While his other hand moved some of Nuvian ́s hair out of his face. 

The other ́s skin had gone pale, and Kelvion mumurmed quiet comforting words. “You're alright, just get it out, you'll feel better afterwards”. He gently tucked Nuvian ́s hair behind a pointed ear.

He had gone quiet now, breathing heavily, though he had stopped throwing up. Kelvion spared a quick thought as to where Cerex and Hirskar were to be found at the moment. Then again, he thought, perhaps it was for the better if Cerex was not here to witness Nuvian in his current state. 

The white-haired elf would not hesitate to interrogate Kelvion, probably with something sharp pointed at his person. At that thought, he realised it would most likely only be a matter of time before said elf came this way.

Riverwood was a small town, and they could be seen at pretty much any moment. Glancing at Nuvian, Kelvion made the decision to get him back inside and hopefully he could get him to lie down somewhere.

Leaning down to peer at the other’s face he asked lowly. “Nuvian, are you with me? I believe it would be best if we got you to lie down. How about you come inside again?”. Hopefully the red-head was too nauseous to be stubborn about being moved.

Still, Kelvion decided that he would carry him if needed.

Nuvian nearly didn’t hear the Redguard come up from behind him, again. He had forgotten this guy was an earlier assassin, so of course he would be silent in his footsteps.

The red-head hadn’t even thought he’d go after him, considering they’d not known each other for that long. Yet here he was, holding his hair from his face while Nuvian emptied his stomach into a bush. How elegant.

The comforting words were nice in contrast to the nasty smell and taste in his mouth. But as soon as the other began tucking his hair behind his ears… that was were he drew the line of personal space.

As he had noticed before, the Redguard stood close to him to be able to hold up his hair whilst also rubbing his back. His ears being one of the most sensitive places on his body made the tucking almost uncomfortable in his drunken state of mind. Kelvion had asked him if he was still with him, he was. Did he want to come back inside and lie down? Not really.

Somehow though, Nuvian thought it to be the better option, seeing as Riverwood wasn’t the biggest town and the others; Cerex and Hirskar, might just turn around at this or that corner. He did not want Cerex to see him in this state. Iit had happened far too many times and the scolding following every time was unbearable.

Right, he’d have to give the other an answer. Carefully, Nuvian straighten himself up. Feeling the blood rush down from his head, causing him to waver slightly on his feet but not stumbling over himself. He shook off Kelvion’s hand from his back and lightly smacked the hand at his hair away. Not hard, but gently.

“Yes, I-I’m with you Kelvion. I would be agreeable to lie down, but we don’t have a room at this tavern… where do you expect me to lie down? I gotta say, I outright refuse to lie on the ground.” Nuvian did what he’d do at any other awkward situation, turn sarcastic and make a joke of it all. Being in such a delicate and fragile state as he was now, it didn’t set well with the red-head. 

“However, I would like to propose that if you have somewhere for me to lie down, now would be the time to go. We have no idea when Cerex and Hirskar come around for us, or me rather. Cerex knows me too well. He knows I always end up in the taverns.” Having said that, Nuvian made ready to walk up the stairs. But was surprised by how wobbly his legs had gotten as they almost fell out under him. 

He caught himself with his right on the wooden wall of the tavern, as he was about to fall. He breathed heavily, 

“If I had to eh-estimate how long we have been here. I would say it won’t be long before he comes poking his head around. Making sure I once again don’t cause any trouble, or harm myself.” 

Having taken a breather, Nuvian tried again to slowly make his way up and towards the stairs. His right hand supporting him against the wood panels.

Smirking slightly at the obvious display of stubbornness, Kelvion had to admit he liked Nuvian’s fiery sarcasm and temper. The younger male made up for his small stature with his wit and silver tongue, it seemed. Even now on wobbly knees, he tried to make his way back on his own after just puking his guts out. 

Nevertheless, he would not have the other fall and land face first in the dirt. Yet, Nuvian had made it clear that he did not want to be touched. There was a line not to cross. Most people had that of course, but Kelvion found himself a bit disappointed. He found that he wanted to be closer to the other, wanted to feel the silky texture of that red hair between his fingers again. 

Keeping a slow pace with Nuvian, he would be ready to catch him if need be.

“My thoughts exactly. And don’t worry about having no place to rest. I got the coin to spend, so I will rent a room for us to use”. Then something Nuvian said caught up with him, and he cocked an eyebrow in questioning amusement. “If Cerex feels he must keep an eye on you, you must be quite the troublemaker. Or trouble has a tendency for finding you,'' he teased. 

He chuckled, “Forgive me, I mean nothing by it. I know some people here in life can be magnets for trouble, through no fault of their own”.

They had now reached the top of the stairs and were making their way to the door. Kelvion glanced out of the corner of his eye on the road. Trying to see if perhaps Cerex or Hirskar were anywhere in sight and found them not to be, luckily. 

He opened and held the door for the half-elf, then turned to the barkeep. Digging through his coin purse, Kelvion held out a sum which should give them a room for the day. “Excuse me and my companion, he has had a bit too much to drink. Might we get a room for him to rest in. Single bed. I won’t be needing it”.

The barkeep looked wary for a moment, but then relented and took the coin, pointing them to a room. Kelvion turned and indicated for Nuvian to lead the way. His legs were still shaking, but he still seemed adamant at getting to their destination on his own. 

The room only held the bare necessities, but at least it had a bed that would suffice. Kelvion took a seat in the only chair. “Here you go, Nuvian. You can get some rest now” 

Nuvian stood at the doorway for a few moments, the door behind him closed. Looking from the dark skinned Redguard in the chair to the bed, Nuvian had this uneasy feeling in his body.

“Um… do you… do you have to be here, while I rest I mean?” 

Anxiety rose inside him. “Don’t you think the people outside,” he motioned with his head. “Don’t you think they’d be confused by.. Two guys, sharing a room? I know you told the owner for a single bed, and that you wouldn’t be using it but… “ Nuvian trailed off, perhaps he should just lie down before he made a fool of himself.

Moving away from his place at the doorway, Nuvian made to first sit down at the edge of the bed before descending his back on the mattress. Pulling his legs up with a smooth, quick motion. 

Here he laid… like he would be able to get any rest with the assassin in the room. Keeping an eye on him. 

“Right now, you’re no better than Cerex.” Having said that, Nuvian turned to lay on his side, his back to Kelvion. It gave him a slightly better feel of comfort. Besides, the wooden wall had a rather intriguing pattern. 

Nuvian’s hand rose up, the one he wasn’t lying on. He started tracing the pattern with his finger in an effort to ignore the gaze of the other. He was mad at himself for not being able to control his drinking, and for almost having lost control of his fire.

He was not so much mad at Kelvion. He was more disappointed in him thinking he’d have to keep an eye on him. 

“You don’t have to stay, you know that don’t ya?” It might sound like he was trying to get rid of him, which he was. He just didn’t want to tell him straight out. “I’m nothing but a trouble magnet after all, you’d be better off away from me. And please, don’t tell me ‘you’re not a trouble magnet, you’re just unlucky.’ Don’t lie to me, I lie to myself more than enough.”

Why? Why was he here spilling his sorry guts to this guy? He should probably stop speaking now. So he did.

Kelvion blinked at the blatant dismissal. Nuvian’ s mood had taken a sudden turn for the worse. The elf’s back looked tense as he lay on the bed.

He hadn't intended for his words to be taken to heart like that.. Though now he saw that Nuvian might regard his efforts as him keeping an eye on him in Cerex’s place. Of course the younger wouldn't appreciate that. Yet Kelvion also felt a flare of annoyance. 

He had only been trying to be helpful after all. “I can assure you that I’m not here to “keep and eye” on you. Cerex has not placed me on guard duty. From your response, I would imagine he does that enough on his own.” Kelvion took a moment to take a deep breath. “And honestly, me calling you a trouble magnet was not meant as an insult. I merely teased.” Nuvian did not turn to face him, and Kelvion frowned slightly. Was he that embarrassed from his drunken escapade or offended by Kelvin's words? 

Seemed silly in Kelvin's opinion.

“Did it occur to you that I might choose to stay here to ensure that your comfortable. And not to make you stay against your will? You did just vomit your stomach up, and your legs were shaking beneath you”. Kelvion sat with his elbows resting on his knees, observing the bed’s occupant. His frame was slight, more on the thin side yet there was some strength to be found in those limbs.

His red hair fell on the pillow in short waves, and Kelvion briefly remembered the feeling of it before he forced himself back to the conversation at hand. “What do you mean I would be better off away from you? I can assure you I’v seen my fair share of drunk people making a bit of a fool of themselves. Doesn't mean I don't want to be in your company”. 

Kelvion waited for Nuvian to say something, feeling there was more going on here than what he knew. Nuvian was hinting at something else, but seemed averse to actually say what.

Annoyed, Nuvian turned back to face Kelvion sitting in the chair, huffing out a deep and loud sigh.

“Let me get one thing straight, I am not embarrassed because of my drunken behaviour. To put it simply I just… ugh!” At his loud exclamation, he sat up on the edge of the bed again. His hands gripping hard on the wooden bedframe. “Nothing in my life has been easy. I am not one to complain. My childhood could have been much worse, I am not about to complain about it exactly because of that.”

What was he even saying? Kelvion had no idea about his childhood…

“You say you’re not here “to keep an eye on me”. That Cerex hasn’t sent you- Yet you contradict yourself and your words when you go ahead and tell me you want to ensure my comfort? No, you’re not keeping me here against my will. Of course, I know that. Cerex wouldn't even turn to such measures… “ 

Honestly, Nuvian wasn’t about to tell about his childhood, not in this sobering state. “Anyway, thank you for the room. I’ll make sure to pay you back sometime.” His harsh grip on the wooden bedframe let up, his eyes had been trained to the stone floor. Now however, he dared to peek up at the Redguard. He wasn’t sure what to make of his face, he couldn’t read it. 

Everything in the room had turned kind of blurry in fact. What was going on? It wasn’t until Nuvian blinked he realized what it was that made it all seem blurry. Tears. Shame filled his gut as his left arm went to his face, in a hurried attempt to rub away the tears rolling down his cheeks. Together with the ones threatening to fall. 

Nuvian faltered, his gaze downwards once more in a slight hope that the other hadn’t seen them. 

That plan quickly fell to the floor in splinters of sharp glass as his body shook with a trembling sob. He’d tried to keep it down, he had tried so very hard. 

Kelvion sincerely did not know how to react to this situation he suddenly found himself in. One minute, Nuvian was not telling him anything. Then the next, it was like a dam had broken and he couldn't get the words out fast enough. 

This was not at all how he had imagined the day to go.

Kelvion had looked forward to a bit of small talk with the other. Get to know him better and see where they might stand with each other at the moment, after the whole disaster with the Brotherhood. 

On the road, Kelvion had gotten the impression that Nuvian was of a jovial nature, but could take matters seriously when he needed to. “Now you just wait a gosh darn minute, I don't know where all of this is coming from. Maybe it's still the alcohol talking. But yes, you fool, I got you this room because I wanted to ensure your comfort. I thought that quite clear already”. He could see Nuvian getting more irritated,but his eyes were focused on the stone floor. 

Kelvion kept speaking. “Is it that difficult to understand that it might have been a simple courtesy, to make sure you didn't fall on your face into your own vomit? As if Cerex or Hirskar might not have done the same for you in-” Kelvion stopped abruptly as he looked closer upon Nuvian’s expression. It was tight, he looked almost like he was in pain.

At one point Kelvion had stood up during their argument. 

Nuvian seemed so much smaller all of a sudden. His eyes were shiny and then Kelvion heard the gasping sound of a sob. He was frozen, and at one of the very few instances in his life, Kelvion was completely unsure of his next move. He was a trained assassin, a killer for hire. He didn't know how to comfort someone in emotional distress. Feeling ridiculous, standing there on the floor like a fool, Kelvion simply stared as Nuvian began sobbing in earnest, one gasp leaving him after the other.

For the Dark Mother’s sake, he thought, do something anything than standing here. Leave if you have to! Yet he felt that was the last thing he wanted to do. Kelvion gazed once at the door, then back to the distressed red-head before him and sighed internally.

He wanted to at least show some sympathy, wanted to comfort him as he was obviously not alright, but how he was meant to go about it without making it worse?. 

Kelvion took a couple slow steps toward Nuvian, and crouched down on one knee before the bed trying to look him in the eye. 

“Nuvian..”he said carefully, slowly. “Tell me how to help. Explain to me how to help you. What do you want me to do?”. He managed to keep his voice low and nonthreatening, he hoped. A concerned frown had taken over his face. He had no idea what was going to happen next. 

Nuvian couldn’t blame Kelvion for not knowing what to do about this. He had little to no idea himself. His mind was trying to figure out what to do and what to say, but nothing came into his mind. Everything was blank. 

The tears wouldn’t stop flowing, and at Kelvion’s calm words the dam seemed to break further. The silent tears and quiet sobs, now turned into full out wails and harsh intakes of breaths. What could he tell Kelvion? What did he need? It clicked in his brain suddenly. He knew what, or who, he needed. 

Through several sobs, Nuvian managed to make out the words “I-I wa-want… I-I-I Want dad… I want Cerex. Plea-please, find him.” Knowing he had managed to dish out an answer to Kelvion’s questions, his wailing continued in loud cries. Some of them so hard they didn’t make a sound, but left his mouth open wide, no air coming out either. Nuvian’s face was going red from the lack of air. It felt like forever before he could manage to take in a gasping breath, though the whole thing would start over again and again. 

Only one person could stop this and he wasn’t here right now. 

“Kelvion… you must find Cerex.” Another loud intake of breath. He was starting to hyperventilate. He wanted to scratch at his scar again. He hadn’t thought about it before but the itch had come back, he could ignore it no longer. 

This time he didn’t hesitate to roll up his sleeve. He needed the relief of scratching freely, so he did. The red-head knows he shouldn't, he knows. He’ll keep on scratching until the skin goes raw. Until it breaks and blood flows … He should never have drunk that much. Nuvian knew he couldn’t take that much. Never could.

The Redguard assassin took to the plea like an order. Those were instructions. Instructions he could deal with.

He got up quickly and made for the door, but the sound of Nuvian practically gasping for air made him hesitate. He glanced back. His face was red and his eyes unfocused. Then he saw what Nuvian was doing to his left arm.

Just like earlier today he was scratching at his forearm. But now it was with much more vigor and he had pulled up his sleeve. Kelvion caught sight of the raised skin, now slightly irritated from Nuvian’s incessant nails running across it.

Dread filled Kelvion as it hit him that, if Nuvian kept going, the skin would break and he would hurt himself. Moreover, he seemed in no mindset to stop. 

Feeling conflicted more than ever, Kelvion opened the door abruptly and prayed that the barkeep was still where he last saw him. Spotting the man swiping the floor with a broom, relief rushed through Kelvion. “Hey, you!!”, he shouted, startling the poor man so much he dropped the broom. “What in tarnations-”, but before he can get any further, Kelvion interrupts him. “I need you to find a snow-haired elf outside. He should be at the merchant, accompanied with a red-haired man. Tell him Nuvian needs him, right this instant!!” The barkeep looked affronted and was about to retort, but Kelvion would have none of it.

He grabbed his coin purse, tore it from his belt so the cord snapped and threw it at the man’s feet. Sending the man an urgent look, he hoped would convince him. “Take that as compensation, just go and find him!”. He then smacked the door shut, and missed whatever reply he might have gotten.

Kelvion turned to the one who needed him most in this moment.

He flinched at the sight Nuvian made, hunched over his arm and gasping like he was drowning. Moving without thinking, Kelvion got on his knees before him, and took hold of Nuvian’s hands to stop him from hurting himself any further. Except, he had to immediately recoil and hissed in surprise. It felt as if he had just grabbed whitehot iron from a smith’s forge. A quick look at his palms showed no marks, but the heat had been real. He was sure of it. 

Seeing Nuvian was still caught up in his own head, Kelvion took a different approach. He grabbed hold of the thin wrists and held them firmly, but gently away from each other. He saw blood under Nuvian’s nails on his right hand, and he felt him twitch in an attempt to keep going.

Keeping his hold, Kelvion called out to him. “Nuvian, Nuvian can you look at me please? Focus on me. Cerex is on his way, he is on his way right now. Until he gets here, I need you to breathe, alright? Breathe nice and slow, like me. Look at me and breathe with me”. He hoped that what he was doing was right, he had no idea.

He could feel the faint heat emitting from Nuvian’s hands and kept his hold on his wrists. Trying not to squeeze and leave bruises. He couldn't hurt Nuvian, not when he was like this, even unintentional that might make him panic even more.

Through his hazy mind Nuvian felt bad for Kelvion. He felt bad that he had to witness him like this. The poor guy had only wanted to make friends with him, yet here he is ruining his chance of having a true friend. 

It wasn’t like Cerex and Hirskar weren’t his friendsT they were just more like… his guardians. Nuvian had no clue how to explain this even in his own mind, he just knew it all felt different.

Hearing the slight panic in Kelvion’s voice, even when he tried so hard not so let the panic resound through his voice, made the red-head look back up at him. Silver eyes met his and for a moment, he felt safe. Doing as told, he managed to get a few breath out normally. However, for every step forward, Nuvian felt he would go two steps back. Fat tears rolling down again like hail, and his wailing would commence. What didn’t make the situation better, was for the sandy-haired Redguard to grab his wrists tightly. 

Before, the other had tried to grab a hold of his hands and regretted it instantly. Nuvian knew why. 

The magic within him had taken over, not flaring, but creating a shell around his hands. The shell had stayed and maintained it’s form only on his hands, as that was what little control Nuvian could hold over it in his panicked state.

Had Nuvian not learned this long ago from Cerex... Well, then the assassin, now holding his wrists in an attempt to make him stop scratching, would be burned. Heaving for breath, he managed to get words in between the ragged gasps. “I’m try-tryi- ng Kelvion. It’s-It’s so diffic-ult!” Nuvian was unsure whether he could afford to let his attention slip from the magic inside him. Or if he should give up trying his best to regain his breathing and focus on what the assassin was saying. What he was telling him to do. Could he even afford to wait around for Cerex to come? If not then… what would happen? 

He tried to compose a sentence “So-sorry, I- That I burn-ed you”, was what he managed. In all truth he was sorry he had burned the other. Yet he also knew it mattered little to the Redguard now. Nuvian wanted free of the taller’s grasp, trying with all his body weight to wrestle out of it. Futile attempts really, half hearted too. 

Exhaustion could be felt throughout his body, but the tears and cries still wouldn’t stop. Dizziness made his head feel light and heavy at the same time, a sort of noise ringing in his ears that he just wanted to stop.

Looking into the panic and dread ridden face of Kelvion made Nuvian’s heart clench. It also made him wonder how someone like Cerex could remain calm in situations like these. Did he have the feelings of envy towards Cerex right now? 

Now really isn’t the time for that, ya think? No… Now was not the time for stupid thoughts like these. You know you’ll be happy to see him once he burst through that door. Yes, he would. Let it be soon. 

He felt great relief that Nuvian at least responded to him, even just a little. His breathing was still much too taxing and was obviously wearing on him. Kelvion need to get him to breathe easier yet. “You are doing just fine Nuvian. Breathe easy, that’s it”. 

He started running his thumbs in circles on Nuvians wrists, hoping it would not be invasive or uncomfortable for the other. “You can do it. Don’t worry about me, I'm fine, you didn't hurt me. I’m sure Cerex is on his way here right now”. He didn’t know what else to do at the moment. 

He had effectively stopped the red-head from scratching his arm bloody, but now they were stuck sitting here. And Nuvian was not getting better as far as he could tell. 

Damn it, he cursed at himself internally, what else could he do?. 

Biting his lip, Kelvion kept talking, nonsense spouting from his mind. He just had to keep talking. Make Nuvain focus on him and not whatever demons in his mind that were trying to drag him under. “You must have some interesting stories to share. Either from your time with the Thieves Guild or from your travels with Cerex and Hirskar. You three seem like quite the enigmatic group”. 

He didn’t know why, but suddenly he started talking and he couldn’t find it in himself to stop. Not when Nuvian had tears in his eyes and looked so pained. “My time with the Brotherhood took me to many destinations here in Skyrim, but I grew up in Hammerfell. Specifically, in the city Sentinel. If you wish it, I can tell you a great many tales of the city. It’s beauty and the people there”. He could feel Nuvian twisting this way and that, trying to free himself from Kelvion, however unconsciously.

He did not relinquish his grip, merely loosened it a bit. He could easily catch his arms again if he tried to hurt himself once more. He just hoped Cerex was actually on his way, otherwise Kelvion would have to figure something else out. 

The other tolerated his presence at best, but that was not saying a lot in their current predicament. 

By the divines, he thought gravely, Cerex hurry up. He kept murmuring soft nothings. Words meant to assure Nuvian he wasn’t alone, but he had no honest idea if they were doing any good. 

____________________________________________________________________________

Cerex huffed a light breath as he checked the contents of their bags and supplies. He and Hirskar had almost finished up at the merchant’s store, food and a few potions for the road as well as more robe. And he got to sell a few gemstones he had been saving in exchange for coin.

“I believe we are almost done, though we should probably pay a visit to the local smithy. I need more arrows and I’m sure the rest of you should also get your gear checked”. He blew a strand of hair out of his face and noticed it seemed quite dirty. A dip in the lake wouldn’t go amiss either it seemed.

Just as the two of them were about to leave the store, Cerex was almost met with a door to the face. He jumped back and stared at the barkeeper of The Sleeping Giant in astonishment. The man looked as though he had been running for his life. A sudden thought of a dragon attack had him on alert. Those creatures had a tendency of showing up out of the blue. 

The human looked around frantically before doing a double take at Cerex. “Ser Cerex?” 

Looking briefly at his companion for a moment, Cerex cocked an eyebrow at the man. “Yes? How may I help you, Ser?” The man gave a big sigh of relief, almost sagging against the door. “I was told to look for you and to send you to the tavern. A young Redguard man gave his entire purse to me in desperation. Said he needed you there at once. Someone by the name of ‘Nuvian’ is in need of your assistance. Dreadfully so, it seems”. 

Cerex felt his chest tighten uncomfortably and he would have paled at the words if his complexion had allowed it. Without warning he thrust the bags in his hands at Hirskar and stormed past the flustered barkeeper. 

He faintly hears voices exclaim something behind him but does not heed them. Everything else seemed to fade into the background as his focus was solely on the meaning of Orgnar’s words. Nuvian needed him instantly, which must mean something bad had happened to him. He was hurt, someone or something had attacked him. It could be anything really. 

Struggling with his rising panic, Cerex ran down the short distance of the road which went through the town. Springing up the steps two at a time, he came to the front door and flung it open. 

Stalking inside, he scanned the open room and, seeing it was empty, he called out. “Nuvian?! Nuvian, answer me!”. 

Though it was not his young friend’s voice which answered his call, but another familiar baritone. Kelvion’s voice carried through the door of a room to his right and he hurried there. Opening the door quickly, Cerex got caught in alarm at the sight which met him upon entry.

Hearing his name called by a very familiar voice, Nuvian looked up to see where it came from. Though he knew who it was he needed to see the face of this person. He needed it desperately. His gaze which had been locked into place by Kelvion’s silvery grey eyes, changed position when the door into the rented room opened up in a swift motion. 

There, in the doorway stood Cerex. All Nuvian wanted to do was to fling himself at the tall, pale elf, asking for forgiveness, pleading with him not to scold him for drinking too much. 

The want and neediness took over him. Using all the force he could to wrestle himself free from the Redguard’s now loose grip. Using his now freed hands to push himself up from the bed and tumbling over to the elf. Quite literally falling into him, clinging to him tightly, afraid to let go. All the while tears flowed anew, but his wails had turned to sobs, silenced to muffled pleas in the fabric of Cerex’s shirt. 

Exhaustion from his hard crying earlier had to eventually come around, in which it did the moment Nuvian had stood up. He supported himself by clinging onto the taller’s shirt and shoulder guards. Though his hands seemed to be giving up together with his legs, making him fall down into a kneeling position on the stone floor.

Nuvian clung to the left leg of the pale elf, sniffling, wiping the snot from his nose into his pants. 

Through the sobs Nuvian managed to utter silent words “I’m sorry, i’m really sorry Cerex. I have disappointed papa, haven’t I? I’m sorry, I will never do it again. Please, please, don’t be mad…” His fists grabbed onto the fabric, then let go. He did so multiple times over and over. The grabbing mixed with his pleas was like a mantra to him.

He was in a whole other place in the universe as of now. 

Cerex fell to his knees on the floor, following the distraught and panicking half-elf before him. No matter how many times he saw Nuvian like this, sobbing his heart out and asking for forgiveness for things that were not his fault, it broke a tiny piece of Cerex’s heart. 

He heard the other’s ramblings though there was little coherency as he cried. His clothes were wet with tears but he paid it no mind. 

Gently but with enough pressure, he took Nuvian into his arms and held him. He rocked him gently back and forth, shushing him. “Its alright Nuvian, it's alright. You have nothing to be sorry for. Papa is not disappointed, he is not, I promise you. He is not angry at you”. It was then his attention was caught by the assassin still in the room with them. 

Kelvion had gotten to his feet and was watching them silently, something almost open and questioning on his expression.

His eyes were locked on Nuvian, and Cerex felt a flare of anger in him come to life and replace his worry. Keeping his voice quiet, he made to get the Redguard’s attention. “Kelvion”. Said man didn’t react, making Cerex frown. 

He brought a hand up and placed it on Nuvian’s head, stroking his hair and called again a little louder. “Kelvion!”. This time, the assassin’s eyes sprang to his own in attention and his face became void of any emotion. On guard and ready. Wasting no time on niceties, Cerex made short work on his orders. “Out, now. I’ll take him from here”. 

Kelvion seemed conflicted whether to do as bid, so Cerex narrowed his eyes and said, “I won’t ask again. Out”. Kelvion’s own gaze turned slightly cold at that. Cerex prepared for a possible argument but by the divines he hoped it wouldn’t come to that. Not when Nuvian was in this state. Yet Kelvion, after one last look at the red-head in Cerex arms, gave a short, curt nod. And went out the door closing it quietly behind him. 

The snow elf felt some of the tension drain from his own frame after the assassin had left, he turned all of his attention back to what mattered most. Nuvian was still sobbing and tear stricken, poor thing would doubtlessly be exhausted after this episode. 

They would take it in stride though, they always did. Though it did not mean it got any easier. 

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Having no idea what had just happened, Hirskar had been left standing in the merchant’s shop. His hands filled with heavy bags while his elf had broken into a sprint. Leaving behind a disheveled innkeeper and a confused Hirskar.

Blinking a couple of times, Hirskar came back to reality.

He should probably run after the other, so he turned around back to the merchant behind the counter. Handing over the bags asking, “If you please, could you hold onto these until we get back? It would be very appreciated, and we will of course compensate for your inconvenience.” The merchant made a simple nod to him, getting an arm full of supplies.

Making sure everything was in order and safe keeping, Hirskar made to run out the door and towards the inn like Cerex had just a moment before. 

Entering the tavern’s open room, he heard what was undeniably the cries and sniffles of the young half-elf, Nuvian. 

His heart clenched. It hurt him every time he’d witnessed one of his attacks. Bringing a hand up to his chest, his hand turned into a fist and filled with the fabric of his shirt. At the place his heart would reside, where it hurt, and cried out for Nuvian. 

A door closing further down the open hall made the red-head snap his head up, searching for new occupant of the room. His eyes came to the dark skinned Redguard, Kelvion. 

The guy looked like he’d been whirled around a hurricane, hair strands falling down here and there, his usual hair bun a mess. On further notice, he saw the far away look in the assassin’s eyes, it made him wonder what had happened behind the now closed door. 

Hirskar made his way towards Kelvion, making sure his steps were loud enough to alert the other of his presence. To be on the sure side, as to not startle the man, Hirskar coughed dryly.

Curiosity got the better of the nord, in a casual tone he asked, “Hey Kelvion, you alright? What happened in there?” Before letting Kelvion answer, he continued. “Wait, did Cerex throw you out of the room?” It wouldn’t surprise him if Cerex had done that. He was the most protective of the young boy in there, not that he could blame him. 

Being pulled out of his thoughts by the arrival of Hirskar, Kelvion glanced at the Nord for a moment before he turned away again, frowning. He was not entirely sure why, but the clear dismissal with which Cerex had sent out with annoyed him oh so much. As if it was not his own efforts which alerted the elf to the fact that Nuvian needed him! 

He huffed under his breath. No matter, if the old elf wanted to be surly, then let him. 

Crossing his arms and taking a deep breath he turned to face Hirskaar and answer him. “Ser Cerex is with Nuvian in there”, he indicated the door behind him and shrugged. “He had had a bit too much to drink and got sick. Then… I’m uncertain as to what exactly happened next. But he became...distressed. Started talking about his childhood, and how he wouldn’t complain or something”. 

He knew he sounded dismissive and whiny, and by the Dark Mother he should be better at controlling himself. But he honestly couldn’t help it, he really wanted to stab something with his blades right about now. 

This whole affair had thrown him for a loop and he did not like it. “I will leave it to Cerex to handle the situation. He seemed very adamant that they don’t be distrubed”. Then he paused as a thought hit him. He looked Hirskar right in the eye and, not really wanting an answer but asking for one regardless, he said hesitantly. “Should I assume that...this...what happened in there, it's not the first time? For Nuvian to break down as such?”. 

He hoped he was wrong, by the Dark Mother, he hoped he was wrong. 

It didn’t surprise Hirskar when Kelvion mentioned the drinking of alcohol. It had stopped coming as a surprise long ago. He would never deny the half-elf a drink or two under supervision of course. 

Hirskar thought he’d taught the younger better about his drinking habits, thought he could trust him to not indulge in more than he could manage. “Can’t blame you for being angry at Cerex, really I can’t. I will be sure to have a talk with him about this, you should not be the one to blame.” Pausing for a few moments, he thought about what to say to the sandy-haired man in front of him next. 

Taking a deep breath and running his hands over his face from the bottom, up through his red hair. His love would most likely kill him for telling the newcomer about this. He had to be honest though, that much he’d learned. “No… this is not the first time I’m afraid. In fact it's happened so many times I have lost count, and it would be highly unlikely to count on two hands…” he sighed a deep, long sigh. 

Speaking again he said, “I believe it would be unwise of you to bring this up with Cerex. Nuvian is like a son to him, also to me, and all that he does, he does to protect him. Then again, I am not one to tell you what to do. Consider my advice at the very least, yeah?” He offered a friendly smile to the Redguard, raising his left arm to bring it upon his shoulders, lightly squeezing it.

“Don’t be too hard on yourself either. You did right in staying with Nuvian and ensuring someone would go fetch us for help. Thank you, on behalf of me and Cerex. I’m certain you pushed yourself to do your best to offer comfort, even though you’re an assassin” Hirskar chuckled to himself, not sure if the younger would find it funny. He thought he was very clever though.

Taking everything he had just been told, Kelvion mulled over Hirskar’s words and their meaning. How many times have Nuvian suffered through episodes such as the one he just witnessed?

What made his stomach turn even more was the thought that, Cerex and Hirksar had not always been there to help him through it. Had he had anyone to do so back in Riften, with the guild? Kelvion found the idea laughable, but he could hope. How would he come out of it on his own? How long did it take? Kelvion was not sure he wanted to know the answer to that question.

The weight of Hirskar’s hand on his shoulder was grounding, and he was glad the Nord had offered him answers to the many questions swirling in his mind. 

He sighed, “I wouldn’t thank me that easily,'' he said lowly. “I was clueless on what to do about him. Whether to leave him alone or stay. It was a relief he managed to tell me that I should fetch Cerex. I could have done more harm than good. It is as you say, I’m an assassin. We have many skills, but handling a panicked individual who we are not meant to kill is not on the training schedule. I’m sure you can imagine”. He gave a small deprecating chuckled. Then he sobered his expression and looked away to the side. 

So, the group he had unwittingly joined not so long ago was more like a family than he had imagined. An actual family, if Hirskar was to be believed. The Brotherhood had been a family, the only one Kelvion had had for a long time. Astrid had figuratively hammered that notion into every member, every day. Family meant loyalty, but if you failed on a mission, you were never guaranteed that they would be there to get you out. 

He remembered his own biological family too, of course. But he so rarely thought of them nowadays, as it had been many years since they last spoke. 

Shaking himself out of those thoughts, he went and took a seat on the nearest bench, staring into the flames of the open hearth in the middle of the room. After a minute or two of silence, “Your welcome though”. He looked to Hirskar, strands of his hair falling in his face so he brushed them aside. “And I wouldn’t worry about me being nosy in other people’s matters. Unless it involves a contract, I know how to leave well enough alone”. 

That tasted more like a lie than it should have. Lying was part of his profession, he had done to get many a job done. Yet this felt different. Because it involved Nuvian. Why was his mind so bloody focused on the younger man like this? 

Cerex was with him, he would do whatever he needed to get Nuvian back to himself and they could be on their way. So why was Kelvion still reeling like this? It was annoying and yet he couldn’t help it.


End file.
